The reason for this site / about Lucy

I am certainly not the first to compare narcissists with vampires. Like vampires, narcs suck the life and soul from their victims. In Bram Stoker’s book Dracula, the titular vampire preys upon innocent Lucy Westenra until she dies.

But what if Lucy’s story had ended differently? What if she had found the strength of spirit to break free of Dracula and reclaim her life?

Many people suspect their loved ones or associates are narcissists but they want to be certain. Others are already sure, but don’t know what to do about it. And others already are trying to escape narcissistic abuse but feel powerless, confused, guilty, or afraid. Lucy Rising is a completely free online program that addresses all these issues with information, guidance, and even exercises to provide answers and help.

I was the victim of both a father and a husband with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). But I’m one of the fortunate survivors who have managed to reclaim our lives and find peace and happiness. Just as other people helped me in my recovery, I want to assist other men and women who strive to be free of their narcissists.

Lucy Rising, will educate you about narcissistic abuse and Narcissist Victim Syndrome (NVS), and give you an array of tools to help you heal, restore you to your true self, and lead you to a live with more peace, joy, love and fulfillment. I offer this program free online so that no one who wants to participate will be hindered.

This program features the tried-and-true principles of Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction, first developed by Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn in 1979, and now used by hundreds of hospitals and thousands of certified instructors around the world.

MBSR was created to help relieve chronic physical and emotional pain and reduce the negative effects of stress, including Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Countless scientific studies have demonstrated the effectiveness of MBSR, corroborating the testimony of so many who have been helped by it. One element of NVS, typically, is PTSD. I completed the MBSR course with a mind to adapt its techniques to the unique experiences and challenges faced by the victims of narcissists.

My other inspirations include the Dalai Lama, Deepak Chopra, Thich Nhat Hanh, Eckhart Tolle, Tara Brach, Kristin Neff, Elizabeth Gilbert, and many other teachers of the world’s wisdom traditions and their application to modern life. The Lucy Rising program can be adapted to any spiritual outlook and religious affiliation, but it does help if you recognize a beneficent higher power or are at least open to that concept.

I imagined Lucy, so viciously victimized by a vampire, finding the spiritual strength to rise again. I want that ending of the story to be yours, and so I share with you Lucy Rising.

Warning: Please note that while I am knowledgeable and experienced about narcissism and the typically best ways to treat it, I am not a licensed professional. Be mindful of the possibility of your need for professional care, especially if you are experiencing chronic depression, crippling anxiety, or suicidal thoughts. I do recommend that you seek a counselor with knowledge of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. I also recommend that you ask your counselor about MBSR for yourself in conjunction with your prescribed treatment. In-person and/or group counseling is never a bad idea for victims of narcissists and would work wonderfully alongside your doing this or any other MBSR program.

Lucy Rising mods and resources

Lucy Rising is broken down into seven “mods.” Each mod focuses on a key, common struggle experienced by victims of narcissists, a step in the process of education and recovery.

You may go through the mods at your own pace, but it’s probably best not to tackle more than one per day at the quickest, so you can fully incorporate the material and wrap your mind around it. One mod a week may work better for you. If a particularly issue is currently extremely troublesome to you, and you want to dive into a particular mod out of order, you may. But some of the material discussed probably won’t fully make sense unless you go through the mods in order.

The toolbar offers additional resources:

  • Home – Click here to return to the main page for navigating between the mods.
  • The author / contact – Send a message to me if you have a question, need advice, find an issue on the site, have a suggestion for the blog or resource page, etc.
  • Blog – My blog where I discuss dealing with narcissists and provide ideas and resources.
  • Meditations – Where the meditations from the seven mods can all easily be accessed.
  • Resources – Helpful links for you, all in one place.
  • Search – Search all the content of the site.

Content of the mods

Introduction to this mod – Summarizes what you will learn about in the mod.

Lucy’s story – A chapter in my original fictional fantasy based on Dracula’s Lucy Westenra character, which speaks to the topic of the mod.

My story—Max – A related anecdote about my personal experience with my narcissist husband.

My story—Dad – A related anecdote about my personal experience with my narcissist father.

Knowledge – Information and ideas related to the problems we’re addressing in the mod.

Concepts for healing – Actions you can take to move forward in recovery.

Exercises – Some helpful practices you can apply in your life to help you deal with the mod’s issues.

Meditation – A short, guided audio meditation focused on the mod’s issues. The meditations can also all be accessed on the Meditations page (link on the toolbar).

What you need in order to participate

The program is designed to be simple and fit conveniently into your routine and circumstances. You do need a few minutes a day and access to the web, but these are flexible (as no doubt some of you have privacy concerns if you still live with your narcissist). You will probably want headphones for the meditations unless you have a private spot where you can listen, and you will need a place where you can sit or lie down quietly without distractions or interruptions. Any other equipment is optional:  for example, you may want a journal or a place to make notes.

Otherwise just bring yourself, exactly as you are right now, including all your emotions both positive and negative!

The crucial things NOT to bring are any specific expectations or demands concerning the emotional results of the program. For example, don’t plan on feeling 100% better by the time you’ve completed it. Don’t look for a particular result like feeling calmer, sleeping better, no longer missing your narc, feeling “back to normal,” etc. This is not to say that some of these things won’t happen. They probably will! But having specific desires will actually get in the way of your receiving the biggest benefits from your efforts. Instead, be open to whatever particular positives will come your way, with a hopeful curiosity about what they might be.

That’s it, so whenever you’re ready, let’s start by making more sense of your world with Mod 1.

A few notes about the site

The Lucy Rising portrait incorporates elements from Alphonse Mucha’s “Monaco Monte Carlo” poster, now in the public domain.

The story of Lucy presented on this site features Lucy Westenra, a character originally conceived by Bram Stoker in his book Dracula (now in the public domain). This website’s Lucy is very loosely based on that character and the story here is original fiction by the author of the site.

This site is a work in progress and will be perpetually edited to improve content and function. In particular, new links to outside content will be added as these materials are discovered. Please contact the author if you have a suggestion, correction, or other input.

Copyright © Lucy Rising